Six Things I’ve learned About Marriage

5.8.16

Today Matthew and I celebrated six months of marital bliss! And let me tell you, it’s been wonderful. So, without further ado, here are six things that I’ve learned about marriage so far..

It’s an adventure. 
This is where Matthew would say something about “it’s intense—like camping” but seriously marriage is a blast. It is a new experience every day. Even the ordinary things (like grocery shopping or mailing a letter at the post office) become new and exciting because you’re experiencing them together!
It is safe. 
There is no comparison to coming home from a rough day and finding solace inside his arms. In fact, the mere thought makes hard days more bearable, knowing that I’ll have his hand to hold through it all. There is safety in the way that he carefully guards the most intimate parts of your soul. 
It is healing. 
There is something so powerful in trusting your whole self to someone. In a very real sense, he picks up your shattered remains and piece by piece puts you back together.
It is empowering. 
It stretches you into a better version of yourself. It teaches you new cooking, cleaning, or communication skills. It motivates you to be better, try harder, reach farther… and gives you strength to do so. It encourages you to dream bigger and you start to believe you can.
You cannot cut corners. 
You cannot just swagger in half-way and expect to see the fruit. You have pledged your love and life to this person, and now you have to remember that in word and deed every single day. Marriage is NOT 50/50. No, you must give 110% every single day. And you will want to, because your love for them will grow with every passing day.
It’s not hard. 
Don’t roll your eyes. It’s true and I’ll say it again: Marriage is not hard. It is an eternal, perfect institution that is ordained of God. It is not meant to be miserable or a burden. It is meant to bring the highest joy possible. And it does. The root of all the troubles in marriage do not stem from the marriage itself, but from the people in the marriage. The causes of contention in our marriage take root in our own sin, insecurities, or struggles. What if I'm just too insecure? Or too selfish? Or what if we’ve misplaced our priorities? We need to blame our marriage less and instead, allow it to empower us toward something greater.

[[My friends, please don’t misunderstand. There are extreme situations that we must be sensitive to, and as much as I hate divorce, there are times when it is necessary. Abusive situations like domestic violence are NEVER acceptable. Never. Please don’t assume that because I am pro-marriage that I am blind to the realities of life. Marriage can be hell to certain people if one or both partners have forgotten its’ true purpose. If you are in an abusive relationship, you must find a way out. 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) is a free help hotline you can call to get started. You deserve it. And no, you can’t fix him no matter how hard you try. Please, please be safe.]]

With the exceptions of these extreme situations, marriage itself is a powerful thing. And we can overcome any difficulties as we hold tightly to our spouse’s hand and face the world together. Expect great things. Marriage is truly the greatest thing in the world.
Matthew truly is my best friend, and I simply cannot imagine forever with anyone else. 


This picture was taken in about 40 degree weather. And when we snuggled in close, the clouds parted and warmed us with a little sunshine. This will always be one of my favourite pictures because it symbolizes everything Matthew is to me: light, warmth, sunshine, and pure, pure joy. My heart is just overflowing with gratitude. He has changed my life. He has saved my life. And I am so looking forward to a lifetime (and beyond) by his side. I love you, Matthew.


Believe in true love!

Mischief Managed.

_kynia 

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12 comments

  1. Congratulations to you both! I think marriage is great - it's so amazing to have someone who always supports you, and I agree with you - it really motivates you to learn more and be a better version of yourself

    http://allure-square.blogspot.com

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    1. thanks love! Aren't we so lucky to have found it?? Xx

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  2. I love this! Especially the part about it not being hard. Because for me, sometimes marriage is HARD but it's always because of something that I'M not changing or getting better at. It's never because it's hard to love him and be intimate and vulnerable. So the only reason it is hard is because I make it hard for myself sometimes!

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    1. ^^preach it girl. It's always from my own insecurities or distorted beliefs. Here's to using marriage to empower a positive change! you're awesome! xX

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  3. Love this! We'll be celebrating 6 YEARS before the year is out and I completely concur with "Marriage is not hard." Also, your husband's statement of “it’s intense—like camping” cracked me up. Glad you guys are loving doing life together!

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    1. six YEARS! Wow! You guys gotta celebrate that so hard! That's awesome! Thanks Rachel xX you're a sweetheart.

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  4. I really love how you mention marriage being 'safe' - I've always imagined it to be that way, so to hear someone else repeat that is heartwarming :)

    aglassofice.com
    x

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    1. Yes, dear. It truly is. you will find it! xX

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  5. Aww dear, congrats to 6 months! And your dress is so gorgeous! (as I read your comment on my wedding dress post, haha). I do agree that marriage is supposed to be safe and healing. I remember sometimes during hardships I go through, before I go to bed at night I am longing for the day when Cecilio will be right by my side.

    May you and Matthew have a wonderful, God-ordained marriage! The best is yet to come. <3

    Hannah
    Floraful

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    1. thank you dear! <3 Cecilio sounds like he is the perfect match for you. You will love marriage- I am SO excited for you both! xX

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  6. Ah! I love this post! I so agree with you about marriage! Just yesterday Christopher and I were talking about the wonderful feeling of having a safe place in each other. Well said, girl!

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    1. Thanks for reading Rachel! I always appreciate your feedback :) Xx

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